So lately I haven’t been feeling too happy. There is something missing in my days. Everything is a bland routine. The weekdays come and they go, the weekends come and yes I do have some fun, and they go by as well. The days go by but really what are they made of? What do I do that is meaningful? Lately, I have been harping on things a lot. All the things that I am dissatisfied about are coming up repeatedly. I suspect it’s these things that keep me unhappy. There is not much I can do right now to fix any of these things. Drastic actions and decisions have never helped. So I am not doing any of that. But the alternative is inaction, to do nothing while everything remains unsatisfactory. I am supposed to have faith in the Universe and trust that all things will fall into place at the right time and everything will turn out OK. But I am often afraid that this may not be true and that the end result will just be that I wasted time doing nothing. Does that even make sense?
Because at this point in Life, for certain situations I am facing now (I won’t go into the gory details now), I simply do not know what the right solution is. I am not sure what the right decision is.
I also have so much resentment and frustration. There have been a couple of things that have not been working out for me for the past 3-4 years and it’s all adding up. There is a constant ever-present conflict. I strive all the time to be content but it is a constant battle. They say you can make your Life out to be the way you want it to be. It is not true. We do not have the power to influence certain circumstances. We can only change our inner attitude towards our circumstances. This is the journey I am on. To constantly fight the resentments and frustrations that nose into my thoughts.
To be honest, I admit my issues are first world problems, and those living in poverty and starvation will not be impressed by my frustrations. But that is the problem with the human ego isn’t it? When our basic needs are met, we aspire towards higher fulfilment. And the more we have, the more we want, because there is always a next level to aspire to – it never ends. I so desperately want to be content with what I have. But I feel if I don’t keep aspiring to things, I will not grow and my life will stagnate. So I feel I must keep trying… And in this process, there is so much conflict and frustration…
Strangely, after writing all this, I feel better. Nothing has changed, but I feel better about it. No wonder they say writing is good for the spirit. I need to write more!
So… On that note….
Things that make me happy
Well brewed coffee
Devious maids episodes – I am officially addicted
Time with friends
Getting dressed up and going out
Lazy Sunday afternoons (with Devious Maids episodes of course!)
Friends getting married!
Prayer has been said to have healing effects for people, regardless of their belief or non-belief in God/religion. Many a times a lot of us have prayed for something or the other. We may have been disappointed several times when we have not gotten what we have been asking for, sometimes despite repeated attempts. Dispirited, we may ask – What happened to the power of prayer?
Susan Jeffers, in her book Embracing Uncertainty – Achieving peace of mind as we face the unknown, said that
“We have to learn to pray not with a sense of wishing, hoping, yearning or entitlement, but with a sense of trust, gratitude and purpose.”
In other words, we pray for God to give us the wisdom and strength to accept and handle what Life gives us. She also provided a lovely prayer for us to keep in mind and repeat to ourselves daily.
“Dear God, I trust that no matter what happens in my life, it is for my highest good. And no matter what happens in the lives of those I love, it is for their highest good. From all things you put before us, we shall become stronger and more loving people. I am grateful for all the beauty and opportunity you put into my life. And in all that I do, I shall seek to be a channel for your love.”
This prayer resonates with me and every time I read it to myself, I feel a sense of peace and trust that all is happening for my good – even if it doesn’t seem to be that way at the moment.
Here is to a peaceful and blissful day to all of you
Inspire me Wednesdays are about inspiring quotes or inspiring stories, to give us all a mid-week boost.
For today’s Inspire Me Wednesday, I came across a prayer by Rabindranath Tagore. Simple but eloquent words. I especially like the last line.
A Prayer For Courage
Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers,
But to be fearless in facing them.
Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain,
But for the heart to conquer it.
Let me not look for allies in life’s battlefield,
But to my own strength.
Let me not crave in anxious fear to be saved,
But hope for the patience to win my freedom.
Grant me that I may not be a coward, feeling your mercy in my success alone,
But let me find the grasp of your hand in my failure.
It’s a prayer that isn’t asking for God/ a Higher Power to remove our troubles but rather asking for the strength to go through our troubles bravely. For we all know by now that life will always be filled with challenges, they do not magically disappear and the only way past is through them. What we want is the courage, strength and wisdom to go through them. I so like the last line, because it gives me the sense that God is with me even through my failures and difficulties, to bring me through them.
Wishing all of you courage, strength and wisdom!
Share your ideas and inspirations by leaving a comment or emailing me at firstname.lastname@example.org. Every Wednesday , I will choose one inspiring idea/story to post.